Author: imjustdrew

We have all been around those folks that simply light up the darkest rooms when they enter. Then there are those that need that music that sounds like the final boss from an old 90s video game. 

I would guess most prefer to be around the former. 

This has been on my mind for some days now and manifested on my evening run yesterday.  Some people are incompatible with you in many ways. Often one of the biggest is their energy. They may not have the proper emotions, vibe, and attitude you like being around, period. 

I’m the type that likes being around folks that are so positive and zen others tend to gravitate towards them. They keep others calm, even under pressure and chaos. These people are often leaders, barrier breakers, history makers. They have a calm, soothing voice like a Barack Obama or a MLK. Also, they do their best to avoid conflict. They’re all about peace. That’s what I like. 

Either way, your energy has to be compatible with that other person. We obsess over being linked and yoked in other facets, why not equal vibes and feelings. 

Try it now. Get together with a group of people or call some of your closest friends and family. See how they sound and interact. You should feel better having been around them. If not, it may be time to reevaluate and find some new people to around that fulfill that. 

#imjustdrew 

Yesterday marked 10 years since one of the best friends I have ever had passed on. Marcus Austin was simply an angel on Earth, a great person to be around, and an inspiration. 

He exemplified my #imjustdrew movement perfectly, interacting with folks from all walks of life, and overcoming many obstacles to be the socialable person he was. You see, if anyone should have had insecurities, it was Mark. He was partially handicapped for his entire life with dehabilitating spinal diseases such as socilosis. He never had full physical mobility, although he could walk. For long distances, he had his wheelchair. Appearance wise, it appeared that something was also not right mentally. This was definitely not the case as he was academically and socially intelligent. He earned two degrees and several friends in his lifetime. It’s hard to find someone from Anderson to Rock Hill to Charlotte that had a bad word to say about Mark. 

The doctors didn’t predict him to see age 15 but he saw age 30. He was also very independent, doing pretty much everything for himself except large tasks such as driving.  In the 11 years I knew him, I never heard him complain about his condition. He was very positive and always saw the glass as half full. 

He got around, traveled, studied, socialized, played video games with one hand (his left hand didn’t have full functionality) and enjoyed his 30 years. I miss talking with and hanging with this guy. A few times/year, I would venture to Anderson and pick him up or talk to his parents and brother and they would bring him up my way. We found ways to keep in touch and it was never a chore to have him riding shotgun. He was always down for a good time. 

I know Marcus is looking down at me and our fellas and is very proud. He brought out the best in so many people, and knew more about sports than anyone I know. 

I feel like I did well yesterday as it was a good, sunny, humid day in Upstate SC. But now as I write this, I start to realize what he missed on Earth, and the conversations we would have now. He is definitely the type you couldn’t give up around because he never gave up. Life stepped in and quit on him. I miss you homie and I can’t wait to see you again!

#imjustdrew 

Yep we have had a few festivals around the area. Among these include the Iron City Festival, Come See Me, and Spring Fling. There are still many more to come over the next few months. 

It’s a great time and a great way to socialize and mingle, see folks you normally don’t see, and simply have fun. 

Now I believe festivals are good and perfect for socializing and mingling. However, I’m not a fan of them. They block up traffic for days, it’s a nightmare to find parking, and you can honestly find many of the things a festival offers in most cities on a given weekend. I do obviously like when a race is involved and these are good for my #imjustdrew stuff. Beyond that, I know better ways of achieving my socializing, including sporting events and the county fair. 

So I encourage any and all to do festivals, especially if you have small kids. Just don’t expect me to tag along. 

#imjustdrew 

Someone can mention “left behind”, especially in the South and they think you are referring to the Rapture, or even the Marines motto “no man left behind.”

If you truly care for a person, this should be your motto. 

I wrote last week about prom and all of the prom pics and even seeing prom attendees around. These times give me flashbacks to a rougher time when I was left out and left behind. High school was long ago for me, but myself and others often still find ourselves on the outside looking in. It could be something simple, but it can take you back to a bad place in your life. 

This is the season and time to make sure folks are included and belong, and most of all matter. I saw an encouraging pic of one of my running club mates helping a little girl as she was lapped by her friends in a local 5K race. She was down in the dumps, defeated mentally and physically. My friend helped her,used her motherly instincts, and walked the finish line with her. This photo almost brought me to tears. 

We have to do more of this as human beings. When we see someone looking like they are down and distant, give them a pick me up. I wrote another piece on Drew’s World of Random Intelligence about suicide. I mentioned 13 Reasons Why in this article also. In short, people can and will do extreme things when they don’t feel relevant and/or feel inferior. You, me, all of us have to be that shining light towards others. 

Please don’t be that person that lets another fall behind or through the cracks. Trust me, it’s never a good feeling. Also, every small gesture matters, good and bad. 

#imjustdrew 

Those high school and teen years are never easy. Peer pressure makes it much more challenging.

Biggest challenge: it never really disappears. If anything, it gets worse, at least as a young adult. 

No I’m not just talking about having an extra beer or going zip lining or riding a motorcycle. I’m referring to how it seems like we only get into things  (TV shows, music, movies, sports, etc) because our friends are into them. You seem to lose your identity and what you’re into. 

Yes the new Kendrick Lamar album is great. Yes 13 Reasons Why is the must watch on Netflix. But think of this, would you be paying attention or care of any of this if it weren’t popular? 

Many of you know my favorite sitcom is The Middle. It’s not a show you’re gonna see folks tweeting about constantly or pressuring you to watch. It’s a good show, I like it, and that’s why I watch it, period. 

Yes you want to find and have common bonds with those closest to you. Just don’t allow others to pressure you into anything you’re genuinely not interested in. 

There’s give and take in any relationship. This ties into all of that. Have your own identity, like things because you like them, and do things for you. Respect yourself as an individual first. 

Oh and before you head out to see the newest Fast and the Furious movie or try that new restaurant this weekend, be sure to make your own assessment. Don’t be concerned so much with what others say or think. 

#imjustdrew 

Ok after a week or so off, I’m back at it. This has been officially one year since I kicked off the #imjustdrew movement. Thank you all that read my stuff and watch my vlogs. I hope for further support in my future endeavors. 

Now on to this post. It’s prom season. Nostalgia for some, misery for others. I was floored when I got out of high school how many people  (especially lovely ladies) didn’t attend their prom. Heck I even went to my senior prom. It was my first official date.

Matter of fact, prom is a night of many firsts. First official date, first formal dance, first time at a fancy restaurant, first limousine ride, first, well, you get the idea. It jumpstarted dating and even sex for many teens. 

Nowadays, it seems cooler for young folks to go with their friends as one big group. Prom is still big, but now those that have other obligations or no dates have flupped the tradition. They make it a fun night for themselves and others, pressure free. This is often the final night as high schoolers that many will get to party together. 

Every occasion with friends should be memorable and fun. Whichever reason you choose to attend or skip prom, this should be your thinking. Don’t let a moment slip by. 

My prom was lots of fun, as I went with a good friend that I still keep in touch with. Again, I realize all do not have these memories. However, prom is a reminder for better or worse that making these memories are important. 

When you reach my age, you want to live each moment the best you can. Talk to as many people as possible, have lots of fun, be happy and stay out of trouble. I believe all of these are timeless staples of prom season. 

Also, there are always second chances. Adult proms have become popular. I advise anyone to try one. You may actually enjoy it, even if your high school prom was spectacular. 

Okay so go make some epic moments and have great times with the people that matter the most. 

#imjustdrew 

Did I mention how there is so much about high school I don’t miss? It’s not really the way I was treated, or where I attended, it’s the cliques and the overall mentality. It’s the in crowd vs the out crowd. Those trying to exclude others and only thinking of themselves. 

And of course, many don’t leave this behavior ever. It dies with them often. 

There are definitely two sides to every story, and also two sides regarding socializing with others. I have those I hang with more than others, and my friend circles. But I don’t have what I call a real clique. 

I was just talking to my mom about how bad others treat us. I never want to treat anyone badly or make them feel like I did. 

Furthermore, I hate division. Shoot I hated it in school, struggled with it. Division, conflict and drama are things I try to avoid always. If you have any of this, get away from me please. 

There is two much division and dissension in this world. Conservatives v Liberals. Blacks v Whites. Yankees v Rednecks. Chinese v Japanese. The list goes on. 

Why can’t we all just unify and get along with one another? Please stop this inclusion mess and be your own person that won’t stand for this. 

Take this from a biracial person: don’t put yourself in a position where you have to take sides either. You will end up burning yourself. 

Seek to build and connect folks of all walks of life. Just think of Heaven, or even Hell. Do you think Jesus wants division in the Great Beyond? 

You have your own mind, think for yourself, form your own connections, and don’t leave a person behind. 

The Art of War is apparently good for helping others come together in peace. 

#imjustdrew 

Many people want to try to be hard and macho, to protect themselves and not be vulnerable. They are like jellybeans, hard on the outside, but soft and sweet on the inside. 

Then there are those that are the opposite, soft and happy on the exterior, but sneaky, mean and crafty inside. I don’t quite have a name for these folks. 

This is why it’s important to talk to folks and really get to know them. You cannot always judge them by what’s on the surface. Everyone has a story worth telling, and a reason why they behave the way in which they do. 

People are humans, meaning they are fallible and vulnerable. We all right different demons daily. It’s easier to know that you’re not alone here. 

Okay at the risk of rambling, just remember not to dismiss a person because they seem dismissive, short and mean. Also, don’t think a person is the Almighty because they are nice, always happy, and cheerful. Use discernment and good judgment to learn the realness. 

Once you have enough experience and you socialize enough, the truth will reveal itself. Hopefully you will find lots of folks that are like jellybeans in nature.

#imjustdrew 

This is a personal continuation of a post I wrote on laniera74.blogspot.com. I was referring to different types of friends. Well I have had formed many different types of circles, groups and connections. Here they are: 

My Blacksburg/high school friends: 

I have known them the longest, grew up around them basically. They have witnessed the beginning of my personal development and growth. I know I can always pick up where I left with them  

My WU friends: 

I have many friends and connections from my college days. I have my main crew, the Royal Fam. I have other friends from that realm also. 

Work friends: 

I have made many connections and g0od friends through many of my jobs, especially Winthrop, Robert Allen and Amazon. I have found lots in common with these folks and continue to stay in touch with even the ones I no longer work with. 

My fitness/running folks. 

These include not only the members of my running group, Run The Rock. These are also my extended running circle, as well as trainers, instructors, bodybuilders, and those at my gym. We all share healthy tidbits, encourage and motivate each other and have fun outside of the gym or pavement.

My UFC/MMA friends.

I remember a time where I couldn’t find anyone to watch a UFC fight with. Now I have a whole network of people that enjoy the sport and are into it. 

My fantasy sports people: 

This is a combination of school, work, and relatives. We play football, basketball, baseball, NASCAR, and do sports picks. It’s exciting and we talk a lot of good hearted trash. 

My extended family/friends 

This is also a combination of my closest family and friends. I can go to them with almost any problem or issue. 

I feel very blessed and hope to have vacation/traveling buddies and expand my writing circle. Connections are very powerful. 

#imjustdrew 

Back in school, there were many status symbols, things that made you look cool, in, chique. Your new(ish) car, your hot high school sweetheart,  class ring, or even your hair. But it was hard to beat the appeal and swag of your high school letterman’s jacket. 

This put you into jock status, even if you were an average athlete. And those leather sleeves were hot. Don’t forget to take the jacket to your local sporting good store and have it embroidered with your name. 

It was the ultimate status symbol during that time. Since then, many have been trying to fill that void that made them feel popular, awesome, a cut above. 

During college, it may have been your Greek organization  letters, certain T shirts,  or even your coveted college degree. As an adult, it could be your first home, your first new car, or even your first born. 

It is interesting what we deem as status symbols to make us feel important and appealing to others. 

Now before some of you bash me, I have had or have most of these things mentioned. I earned a letter jacket in high school, and still have it somewhere. All I’m saying is earning these things are awesome, but they shouldn’t define you or give you some superpowers that make you suddenly the big man on campus. 

It’s all a mental thing, just like in the Wizard of Oz. The cowardly lion discovered he had courage all along, he had to look deep within. 

Whatever the equivalent of the letterman’s jacket is in your world, I assure you that it’s not necessary to make great connections, or to be great. Find the awesomeness inside, the traits that few can match up to, and you’ll be the top dog soon enough. 

Now to find my letter jacket, but for nostalgia reasons, haha! 

#imjustdrew