Month: April 2019

This is a continued preview into my second book “Scared Eyes”

There are ten basic types of bullies. I will name them and elaborate.

1. The traditional school bully

They are the ones that beat the inferior up, take their lunch money and simply make school tough for many people. It seems no one is meeting at 3pm anymore to fight this bully or even trying to prevent them from being who they are.

2. The work/office/plant bully

This person is worse than any horrible boss. You may feel like you can’t do anything on your own, even talk to the cute receptionist. without them interfering. They have a lot of pull and you don’t feel like they can be stopped. I have seen many people over the years leave a job due to a work bully.

3. Social media/keyboard warrior

To me, these are the worst and probably most deadly. They say and do hurtful things online to you. They troll your posts, try and embarrass you and have others along for the ride. These awful people have caused many children to drop out of school and even take their own lives. It’s ironic how Zuckerberg was a victim of bullying at one time but hasn’t come up with a more constructive manner of dealing with it.

4. The alpha friend bully.

This is also the “frenemie”. You hang with them, talk everyday, go to cool events. But guess what, they leave you out, persuade you into going places or doing things you don’t wish to do.

5. The person who has seen every show/movie and you should also

This goes for Game Of Thrones, Power, Avengers, etc fans. They are all in your face about seeing this or that show and when you do watch it they’re all like “you’re late” or “about time!” Urrmm I’m confused. How are you late to watching something that will be around forever?

6. The fat shamer

This is the person that always notices when someone puts on weight or gets wider. They weren’t praising you when you were slim and trim and at your best shape. They shame not only overweight folks but people in general.

7. The pretty, popular girl

Think the movie “Mean Girls” and Regina George. You dress like her, eat what she eats, talk to who she tells you to talk to. Eved heard of a dictatorship? This is basically what many young girls and some women undergo everyday just to be and remain popular.

8. The star athlete/fit freak

Everyone seems to love the jock and wants to be them. This includes even the woman with the perfect butt, the guy with the chiseled body, or the person you run with that is super fast. You feel excluded and out of place when you don’t fit in to their standards and don’t fit the bar they have raised.

9. The MLM huns

Multi level marketing companies have grown and have spawned groups of reps that hawk, harrass and even bully others into joining their company,buying their products and selling as much as you can. When you can’t, the “huns” tease and harrass you. Now this doesn’t apply to all MLMs or reps, just the huns that repeatedly call you “hun” before guilting you into being part of their venture.

10. The overzealous church members/pastor

Church has gotten bad for a lot of people and if you live long enough, one or more will hurt you. Church people, even lost pastors, can be worst than sinners. Pastors are bullying their members into giving most of their money, going to all of the revival and evangelical meetings and even not going to the restroom during service. Let’s not get started on the members. In short, some of the most mean people are inside the House of the Lord.

#imjustdrew #scaredeyes

Bullying and social exclusion have been around since the beginning of time. It appears only now in the information age that more people are noticing it and taking action.

Well I have a lifetime of noticing it.

I was picked on and bullied as a child. You name it, I was bullied for it. This includes my clothes, my race, stutter, hair, being poor, overweight, slow, unathletic, smart, not getting girls, not having a car. I was even picked on for holding my fork the “wrong” way at a restaurant in Virginia.

Present day, it’s more subliminal and passive, mostly through social media and trolls. People try to verbally attack and assault me. They can’t stand where I am in life, my fitness journey, already having a book out and writing another, having friends, and a great turnaround story.

In short, jealously and hate runs rampant.

But believe me, I don’t take it sitting down. I fight back mentally, physically, etc. In the sixth grade I was actually into four fights, all on the grounds of defending myself. My mom stayed up at the school so much she decided to start volunteering and chaperoning school field trips and activities. She even won Volunteer Of The Year once and this was a woman that went hard for both of her sons. She would try and talk to parents and teachers first. Failing that, she would catch them in public, by phone or at a school activity. She was built for handling any type of bullies.

This has resonated onto me. I may still get down and defeated. But I have the tools and experience to handle anyone that thinks it’s ok to pick at someone for a deficiency or simply to be mean.

Bullying and social exclusion comes in many forms as will be discussed. But this is what this series and my second book “Scared Eyes” are devoted to.

Buckle up, it will be quite a ride!

#imjustdrew #scaredeyes

Ahh truly the season of change.

I never thought my “Falling Out or Falling Back” chapter of “From Darkness To Sunshine” would be so prophetic and leading into my second book.

But here we are.

You look at your long lost friends on social media having fun. Some is because they’re in a different area code now. Others is because they excluded you. Either way it hurts.

The best thing to do is to rekindle things with the friends that you haven’t hung with in a while. If they are resistant, you must take your L and move on. I have more of a series coming to deal with exclusion during the social season.

Basically, know your worth and don’t be afraid to retool your circle. Everyone won’t stay loyal and many will eventually come back. You have to focus on the ones that reciprocate your interests. Hang with the ones with a future and not a past.

There are plenty of outlets to hang out and meet people so don’t fret. You don’t have to sit around and be sad looking at pics forever. You have your memories and the best gift: the present. Present day of course.

#imjustdrew #fromdarktosunshine

This is not something that I like to explain, not even to my own mother. But here we are still feeling the need to break it down.

There are several definitions on the web, even a PDF. But here’s my basic definition of white privilege.

White privilege is when you are of predominantly Caucasian heritage and have never had to experience the pain, looks, and behaviors around you that blacks and other cultures have had to in order to survive. You haven’t had to discern whom is racist against you and will destroy your whole existence based on your look alone. When the police pulls you over, you have a greater chance of living or being let off with a warning.

It’s like Chris Rock says, many Caucasian people do not have to even know who a black person is unless they are in power. Black people have to not only know, but know how to act accordingly. I saw another comedian, Deon Cole, say that black people have to know how to control their “blackness”. Save for racial slurs and other remarks, white people don’t have to do this.

They can walk in the store with four or more of their friends and not get questioned nor followed. They don’t have to ask for a bag when they’re just getting a pack of gum out of fear of stealing. They can look at a black man or woman without getting naughty looks. They can even vote and support a president like a Trump or a Bush and not get accosted.

Everyone that has white privilege certainly isn’t racist. They simply need education and guidelines to being culturally diverse. It’s not easy for a person of color, especially in certain regions and states. Many people still haven’t arrived.

Ask at the proper place and time, perhaps not during this weekend’s Final Four, but continue having these conversations. This will continue to break the racial divide and help us to understand each other.

Sometimes, race does unfortunately matter and cannot be ignored. Everyone needs to be on the same page so that we all know where and when and act accordingly.

#imjustdrew #fromdarktosunshine