Control or Respect: Different But the Same?

Ok there seems to a lot going on with political correctness and simply trying to mind your manners. Those who know me best know I was raised with manners, “act right”, and to respect others and myself. There seems to be something to learn about a group of people everyday. 

I love interacting with all sorts of people but it can be taxing. You try to stay generic but even that’s considered a sign of disrespect depending on the culture or group. It’s more than just race or class also. It tends to be political, religious, preferences in activities, food, bodies, men, women, it’s a lot. 

Sometimes it can go from respect and tolerance to straight control. I feel it’s more control when you try to use your trait or affiliation and affliction as a crutch, a way to get folks to do and behave how you want. Again I believe in respect but you shouldn’t try to get folks to change their beliefs or who they are. Reach a compromise, a balance. That is the best way to move forward in harmony. 

Let’s keep learning about each other, as respect is still a two way street. Everyone isn’t going to understand or care about your ways so you have to learn about them, why they think and behave as they do, and agree to disagree. Why is that so hard fam? 

How about we rely on love, and continue to love one another? Stop with the criticizing, worrying about trivial matters, and relax and enjoy each other? Life is too short for the extra stuff. 

That said, use the remote for your car or TV, not a person.  



It’s Not The End Of The World, Yet Anyways¬†

This is the season for mass social gatherings everywhere. Cookouts, family reunions, vacations, soirees, All White partiers, weddings, and so on. We all want our events to be perfect right down to the tee. Guess what Clark Griswold, it’s not always that way. You can only do the best you can. 

Just because someone burns the food, breaks a glass, eats too early or too much, or even drinks too much (cue drunk uncle), doesn’t mean it’s a nuclear disaster. So simmer down crockpot and keep the festivities going. Nothing will ever be perfect anyways. 

I say this because I socialize with a wide variety of people and go to many different types of events. The common thread is you want everything to turn out great and people to want to come back. I’m here to tell you, if you provide a good time and are hospitable, people will gladly return. They will barely remember any small setback. It may provide for a good laugh afterwards. 

Socializing and party planning can both be stressful and tense. You simply have to breathe, smile and stay positive. Don’t allow yourself or things to get out of control, or lose your cool. If you see a guest isn’t being themselves, give them some space and then check on them then and in a few days. Sometimes it could be nothing, or they may have not wanted to ruin the party. 

Either way, I doubt it’s the zombie apocalypse. You simply have to have fun and be in the moment. That’s why these people come around you, to feel good, escape reality, and have good vibes. If you provide this and good refreshments, you’re winning everytime. 

So again Clark, go back to the drawing board and fix what you can. Just don’t lose your stuff over petty or small issues. The show must go on! 


Treat Others Well

It’s simple but like many things, tends to be difficult anyhow. 

I was looking at my vlogs from a year ago and I did one on acting the way you want to be treated. Many of us just do not treat each other fair or even well. Then we wonder why nobody wants to deal with us or we have so much drama. 

You have to look within yourself, at the man in the mirror, see how you want to be treated. Then, treat people as such. You may not like them, or even respect them. You can be polite though. We all need each other, and chances are, you may need this person in your life. Don’t squander that opportunity just because you were petty and angry. Grab a Snickers and be friendly and cordial. 

Life is short also. You do not know when you or others will take their last breath. Make every moment count. This all starts with how well, or how bad, you treat one another. 


Let’s talk, for real,…

Four of the most dreaded words coming from anyone is “we need to talk.”. Often it’s rarely good. 

Now many of you think only females say this. Therein lies the problem. Females may say it often, but in reality no human being wants to see this. 

Of course everything isn’t unisex and we all should be conscious as to certain things not to say to certain people. It’s not just political correctness, it’s respect. 

I talk to people of both genders and all walks of life and we are ALL human beings. Just like candles. We may have different shapes, sizes, and makes but like candles, our flame makes us all common and human. 

I believe society, the media and activists have gotten too much into the he said/she said it better stuff. It seems there is always a force out to divide us. How about we try to come together? Find common ground  (I feel like a broken record saying this). This comes from talking to and knowing a person, understanding each other. Generic and basic, safe language and gestures should be used unless you really know a person well. 

Also, while we’re talking, if something someone says or does to you bothers you, address it quickly, don’t wait. If you have a sickness or an injury, you wouldn’t neglect that. Therefore, properly and tactfully communicate to someone that may not know different and better. You catch more flies with honey, and it’s better to talk to and not at someone. 

Racism, sexism, classism isn’t going anywhere soon. However one step to extinguishing it is for us to love each other, forgive and simply talk. Treat others as you would want to be treated. We are all people made in God’s image. Differences can be worked out along the way. 

And that being said, I need some local honey! I have a new honey person also.