Author: imjustdrew

And this is obviously not referring to long division and the beginning of school, although I hated that part of math class. 

We all know about the latest media elephant and tragedy, the Charlotteville fracus. Many can agree that all of these groups are different, some more dangerous than others, had no business there, and whoever drove that car needs to be severely punished. Anyone disagree? 

Not many I’m sure. 

Now we’re up in arms and getting divided about blaming Trump  (all 45 Presidents have been under scrutiny, ever FDR), and now people want Confederate memorials removed. Now unless I’m missing something, we are removing these due to hare groups that have nothing to do with the actual history and all going on here. 

And don’t fret, I’m not here to sway folks either way about the Confederate Flag or memorials. That is a choice, and you can’t change people’s beliefs. But why aren’t we coming together as people to discuss the real issues? Hate groups such as these cannot be allowed to divide us. We have to come together to remain strong as a country. 

This is more than a racial thing, it’s an heinous act of violence and terror. It’s hate, pure and simple. We are forgetting to live and love, and be peaceful. Some in the groups tried that, but fell off track. Now look at the snowball effect. 

Point being, this is why I talk about conversing with folks different than yourself and finding that common ground. Also, stay on topic, please. Don’t let the media and other’s thoughts tear you apart. We must come to an understanding and compromise, or it will happen again and again. 

It saddens me where our country has gone. We can only blame each other. Now we have to come together and gradually fix this. This starts through peaceful talks. 

I was taught as a child running away doesn’t solve your problems. Well guess what, unless a medal is involved, I’m tired of running. I hope you are too. It’s time to peacefully assemble and talk, rather than rally and protest. More can get accomplished this way. 

Also, well played media. You didn’t get me though. I seek to add and multiply, not subtract and divide. 

#imjustdrew #fromdarktosunshine 

I will continue to talk about the power of connections and networking. The more powerful connections you have, the easier life is. 

You can claim all you want how you hate people, you don’t need everyone and such. However, you may find yourself needing someone or something and being lost. Plus time goes on, and gets everyone. Therefore the ones closest to you could drift or leave at any moment. It pays to keep your connects current and available. 

Here are a few reasons why life is much easier. 

1. Let’s say you need your grass cut, somewhere to do laundry, a good doctor or lawyer. Being well connected can keep you good in many areas of life. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or to socialize with folks from different walks of life. This is where they can really come in. 

2. This can help in job/career changes. Many update their resume, which is fine. However, combing your connections from your phone, email and LinkedIn accounts can be much more effective. Over 85% of jobs aren’t advertised, you get in the door easier, past gatekeeping practices such as surveys, phone/Skype interviews and the like. Finally, they can help you land the job you really want, rather than one you settle for just to keep the lights on. 

3. They can assist you in fundraising. 

I’m not just talking about a political campaign or for a catastrophic illness. Many by now know my feelings about school fundraisers and how many use old tried and true methods from 30 years ago to send children to big trips such as Disney and Washington DC. They rarely work, and the parents end up footing the bill. However, for a select few, being well connected assures their funds are more easily raised. This is through church and work connections, business owners and in other markets where that fundraiser isn’t taking place. I still believe the methods are flawed for children. However, connections equalize things. 

4. People rallying for you, period. 

This could be when you’re sick, well, are down and out, or just need someone to talk to. Having a good cheering section is always a difference maker. The Cameron Crazies, Orange Crush, the Black Hole, 12th Man, and several other sports fanbases put that extra fire into their teams and athletes. I played and trust me, it’s a world of difference. 

So now will you think twice before saying people don’t matter to you or that you don’t need anyone? 

#imjustdrew #fromdarktosunshine 

Here’s a quick disclaimer: I don’t recommend the following tips for your day job. They can work for that purpose, but I feel you should turn in and be focused for that purpose. It’s just my personal thoughts. 

Ok on with the post. 

Now this is really geared towards people like myself with active social lives and training regimens. We often have later nights and early morning training sessions. 

Here are some tips that I recently put into place. 

1. Have an extended, reasonable curfew

You can still go out for happy hour with friends/coworkers. However, you shouldn’t stay out all night if you just got off of work or haven’t slept. You must get your proper rest in order for your training and social life to be effective. 

2. Sometimes you must choose

I will go into such instances later on. But you can’t always do both, that’s a fact of life. Coordinate your schedule appropriately to minimize such instances. Having balance is key, and both can be accommodated. 

4. Don’t go out of town or too far from where your training will be. 

For many, everything happens in the same city they live, work and train in. Then there’s me. I happen to be all over. I have stayed with friends or gotten a hotel room to help out. Either way, don’t overexert yourself with extra, unnecessary travel. 

5. Go to venues closeby that will allow you to leave quicker

If a new BDubs  (Buffalo Wild Wings) just opened or a Texas Roadhouse, you already know the wait alone will cut into your time. Pick a smaller, mom and pop place for gathering, especially on a Friday or Saturday. Some I know of are Daddy Joe’s in Gaffney, Patti-Os in Clover, most Ruby Tuesdays, a bowling alley, and Empire in Rock Hill.  Trust me, you have to eat and drink sometime, and you don’t want time taking out for other reasons. 

6. Take a nap, if time permits. 

I wrote on laniera74.blogspot.com about the importance of naptime. If you have a few extra hours, fit in a nap. This will refresh you and may even buy you an hour or two with friends. 

7. Also, for my work and sports friends. 

If you have important, non flexible business the next morning, skip the gathering altogether or cut it way short. If you have a race, an event, work or such, cutting it out completely may be best. There are reasons athletic coaches don’t like their players out at all or too late. 

Basically, just be where you can and know your own limits. Naptime and curfews as a child don’t seem so unnecessary now, right? 

#imjustdrew #fromdarktosunshine 

This past weekend, Girls Trip set box office records and had female groups of all ages flooding the theaters. No Netflix or Firestick for these women. Now I loved it as a male because it embodies what I talk about frequently. It’s so important for groups of friends to get together more often. 

I have yet to see the movie but I know the basic idea is that the women needed a trip together away from work, mates, life, etc. Sometimes we need to mentally recharge and be around our friends and core circle. I plan on a couple of trips with my fellas of different circles and I’m here to tell you, it’s a great thing. 

Summertime is perfect for vacationing together, or just having a fun weekend. Who cares if it took a movie to get certain women together? The point is it got them together and let them know where they were as friends, and where they needed to be. 

I like how my running group does, collectively or as a whole. They make time off of the pavement to go out to eat, coordinating races around all of this, and simply hanging out. They realize it’s more than the pavement (possible slogan Janice if you’re reading?). And we have to realize that these friends are more than coworkers, school friends, connections, etc. They are like medicine or water, necessary. And we can’t let a moment or opportunity to be around them pass by. 

I have a busy couple of months with friends, family and such, my calendar is full. It’s not all guys trips, but I plan to take advantage of every opportunity to hang with friends and family. It’s energetic, refreshing, and simply nothing like it. 

So take your friends and go see Girl’s Trip, any of the upcoming fights or events and have fun! Summer is almost over. 

#imjustdrew #fromdarktosunshine 

My #imjustdrew movement resumes after a couple of weeks off from posting and the reveal for my upcoming book “From Dark To Sunshine: Making Unlimited Friends And Connections.” However, I have been experiencing something I experience a lot mid summer: social exclusion. 

I really had to do my research for this subject as it has a lot of depth to it and ties to childhood. You see, we all get left out of parties, gatherings, group runs, vacations, reunions, etc for the pettiest reasons. What many do not realize  (and I didn’t either) is that all of this is a form of bullying. Many of you know how I feel about that. 

I do not like even feeling like I’m being excluded and now it’s coming full circle. Many people did this to others as children and are continuing the behavior as adults. It’s more subtle bullying, which can be way worse than physical or picking at someone. You are basically saying although they seem loyal to you, they’re only good sometimes or not at all. It’s the syndrome from Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, you may be different, and you’re not invited to participate in any reindeer games. 

This goes further. It seems many people try to also exclude others from associating with you for other reasons also. They don’t you want you around because you’re too opinionated, not “woke enough” or you’re simply a threat. The latter comes into play on romantic relationships. 

These friendships can often be toxic as that person or people may have you trapped. You think they are your friends but in reality they control you, tell you who you can and cannot talk to, get angry and jealous when they see you having other friends. 

Now remember one of the big purposes of #imjustdrew is to have multiple and diverse connections. Social exclusion is in direct contradiction to this. It’s simple, you should only hang around those that enjoy your company, wouldn’t intentionally and repeatedly exclude you, and would not worry if you had different friends. They accept you for you, and trust you. Anything less is unacceptable. 

Therefore, find these people, hold on to them, and don’t stress the rest. Let’s end social exclusion and all forms of bullying. 

#imjustdrew #fromdarktosunshine 

Ok there seems to a lot going on with political correctness and simply trying to mind your manners. Those who know me best know I was raised with manners, “act right”, and to respect others and myself. There seems to be something to learn about a group of people everyday. 

I love interacting with all sorts of people but it can be taxing. You try to stay generic but even that’s considered a sign of disrespect depending on the culture or group. It’s more than just race or class also. It tends to be political, religious, preferences in activities, food, bodies, men, women, it’s a lot. 

Sometimes it can go from respect and tolerance to straight control. I feel it’s more control when you try to use your trait or affiliation and affliction as a crutch, a way to get folks to do and behave how you want. Again I believe in respect but you shouldn’t try to get folks to change their beliefs or who they are. Reach a compromise, a balance. That is the best way to move forward in harmony. 

Let’s keep learning about each other, as respect is still a two way street. Everyone isn’t going to understand or care about your ways so you have to learn about them, why they think and behave as they do, and agree to disagree. Why is that so hard fam? 

How about we rely on love, and continue to love one another? Stop with the criticizing, worrying about trivial matters, and relax and enjoy each other? Life is too short for the extra stuff. 

That said, use the remote for your car or TV, not a person.  

#imjustdrew 

This is the season for mass social gatherings everywhere. Cookouts, family reunions, vacations, soirees, All White partiers, weddings, and so on. We all want our events to be perfect right down to the tee. Guess what Clark Griswold, it’s not always that way. You can only do the best you can. 

Just because someone burns the food, breaks a glass, eats too early or too much, or even drinks too much (cue drunk uncle), doesn’t mean it’s a nuclear disaster. So simmer down crockpot and keep the festivities going. Nothing will ever be perfect anyways. 

I say this because I socialize with a wide variety of people and go to many different types of events. The common thread is you want everything to turn out great and people to want to come back. I’m here to tell you, if you provide a good time and are hospitable, people will gladly return. They will barely remember any small setback. It may provide for a good laugh afterwards. 

Socializing and party planning can both be stressful and tense. You simply have to breathe, smile and stay positive. Don’t allow yourself or things to get out of control, or lose your cool. If you see a guest isn’t being themselves, give them some space and then check on them then and in a few days. Sometimes it could be nothing, or they may have not wanted to ruin the party. 

Either way, I doubt it’s the zombie apocalypse. You simply have to have fun and be in the moment. That’s why these people come around you, to feel good, escape reality, and have good vibes. If you provide this and good refreshments, you’re winning everytime. 

So again Clark, go back to the drawing board and fix what you can. Just don’t lose your stuff over petty or small issues. The show must go on! 

#imjustdrew 

It’s simple but like many things, tends to be difficult anyhow. 

I was looking at my vlogs from a year ago and I did one on acting the way you want to be treated. Many of us just do not treat each other fair or even well. Then we wonder why nobody wants to deal with us or we have so much drama. 

You have to look within yourself, at the man in the mirror, see how you want to be treated. Then, treat people as such. You may not like them, or even respect them. You can be polite though. We all need each other, and chances are, you may need this person in your life. Don’t squander that opportunity just because you were petty and angry. Grab a Snickers and be friendly and cordial. 

Life is short also. You do not know when you or others will take their last breath. Make every moment count. This all starts with how well, or how bad, you treat one another. 

#imjustdrew 

Four of the most dreaded words coming from anyone is “we need to talk.”. Often it’s rarely good. 

Now many of you think only females say this. Therein lies the problem. Females may say it often, but in reality no human being wants to see this. 

Of course everything isn’t unisex and we all should be conscious as to certain things not to say to certain people. It’s not just political correctness, it’s respect. 

I talk to people of both genders and all walks of life and we are ALL human beings. Just like candles. We may have different shapes, sizes, and makes but like candles, our flame makes us all common and human. 

I believe society, the media and activists have gotten too much into the he said/she said it better stuff. It seems there is always a force out to divide us. How about we try to come together? Find common ground  (I feel like a broken record saying this). This comes from talking to and knowing a person, understanding each other. Generic and basic, safe language and gestures should be used unless you really know a person well. 

Also, while we’re talking, if something someone says or does to you bothers you, address it quickly, don’t wait. If you have a sickness or an injury, you wouldn’t neglect that. Therefore, properly and tactfully communicate to someone that may not know different and better. You catch more flies with honey, and it’s better to talk to and not at someone. 

Racism, sexism, classism isn’t going anywhere soon. However one step to extinguishing it is for us to love each other, forgive and simply talk. Treat others as you would want to be treated. We are all people made in God’s image. Differences can be worked out along the way. 

And that being said, I need some local honey! I have a new honey person also. 

#imjustdrew 

Just recently, I lost my final living grandparent. My paternal grandfather Roosevelt “Hut or Rooster” Jamison, went on to be with the Lord at age 93. It was a very bittersweet homecoming. 

I was privileged to have a good relationship with Hut. He embodied my #imjustdrew movement well, as he was very sociable, friendly, loved having fun and never met a stranger. I will miss our calls and visits. 

He was a man that had a great life and legacy and a sharp man. He was a WWII veteran and a free Mason, along with a family man and a retired employee of Firestone Bridgestone in Kings Mountain, NC. Even into his 90s, his mind was active and smart. He played cards regularly with friends when he still drove, spades and Bid Whist being his specialties. 

He was very active, pretty much independent and self sufficient until a couple of years ago when he was placed into a rest home. He had 2 artificial hips and still got around better than most with 2 real hips. Very inspiring indeed. 

I was blessed to have my grandparents as long as I did. They are all looking down on me. I do my best to make them proud and to live out their lessons and legacies. 

R.I.H. and S.I.P. Grandpa Hut and thank you for treating me as well as you did. We need more people like you. 

#imjustdrew